| | Current Music: | jaco pastorius | | Current Location: | work | | Subject: | JUST BECAUSE | | Time: | 08:28 pm |
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| | i grabbed marios pubes dosent mean im gay. Now one may ask, rangerbob, how does one get a hold of a grown ass mans pubes without doing some gay ass sh*t? elementary you dumb mutha f*cker, magic and a lack of eye contact. now toss a niggas salad and quit asking me my name. daddy will suffice. | comments: Leave a comment   |
| being a loser ass faggot. much like myself. this is effing retarded. sitting at work, this time of night. its like a blowing a legion of dudes. most have there break through by now but a home girl told me im not done yet. but its hard to believe when your limp wrist is in full swing and fall out boy is blasting in between your ears and you missed the last bus home trying to square away your minimum wage job. in which no matter what happens it makes sure to bend you over and spite the most high without the courtesy of a little lube. (much less a reach around)
all im saying, is ive probably wasted years on straight edge. i should seriously just pick up a drug problem, lose my effing marbles and piss my already wasted life away.
i mean, at least itll make things more interesting right? who knows, maybe ill get a book deal out of it all and sell the rights...
send all tranny hookers too 3954 marcus is a douche bag way care of this nigga right here. | | comments: 6 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | ben harper | | Current Location: | work | | Subject: | ugh | | Time: | 05:36 pm |
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| there must be a team of nazi scientists in side my stomach cooking meth and raping midgets right now trying to make my life hell. id pray for death but im saving that little favor for a later date.
please sedate the sh*t out of me. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| god why? i dont believe the ratio of positive to negative ratio is balanced in the slightest.
i mean think about it, the 2 most common reasons for starting some sh*t is god and "love" which is usually just effed up misplaced sexual desire half of the time. think about it yo. war, murders, vandalism. "bi*ch stole my man" and all of that kind of ish. wtf son?
i mean for real, if it wasnt for sex, i wouldnt be in your hair and there would be a lot less spite in the world. my existance makes people question their belief in god. it makes people vote pro choice. it makes them racist and scowl upon interacial dating in fear of the birth of yet another rangerbob.
none of these things would be an issue if it werent for sex.
now mind you rape and bookaki parties would be out but im sure my grandmother can find other hobbies.
and sure maury povich would no longer be on there due to a lack of confused whores who cant fugure out who the hell the babies daddy is after being on the shwo 3 previous times. and jerry springer would unfortunately have to shut their cameras off too. but really, isnt it about time anyway?
listen all im saying, is that someone needs to sterilize me, complete my conversion in to a-sexuality and give the world a cold shower before the oceans are filled with cum and aborted fetus's (or feti maybe?). and the land fills are full of old porn and crates of condoms which are obviously no being used.
also, this was an over all weak post but i felt like putting something up. get at me bi*ches. | | comments: 5 comments or Leave a comment |
| yeah dudes its me. jut as crass and disillusioned as ever. what else would you expect from a massive doucher who when you really think about it, you dont even really like that much?
but anyway, enough about that, i just wanna say that im terribly excited about brittny spears being on top again. not in the news for baby daddy drama or being a hopeless piece of whit trash who degrades our society and makes the gene poo all that much more shallow or giving douche bag free loading wiggers hope.
nay my friends. in the spotlight for doing what she does best. looking hot and making sh*tty ass pop music.
the come back is over. now shes just here.
i wonder if theres any controversy left? from teen whore, to lesing out to showing her cooter to multiple marriages to child endangerment i mean what else is there?
now dont get me wrong kiddies, im proud of this bi*ch for constantly ruinig her life with poor decisions (which i believe is a secret conspiracy to keep the nation distracted and entertained while the government and its giant corporations royally butt f*ck us) all so we can have some water cooler gab but yo, im am afraid. what if the next step is just for her to be a true southerner and role up in klan hood and start burning crosses on stage?
wait, that would rule! 10 klansmen covered in sequins doing synchronized dance steps? thats a "thank you jesus" waiting to happen. then she could title her next album the same thing that nas wanted to...
god bless america and god bless you ms spears. call me when your slutty ass sister is legal. | | comments: 3 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | PUBLIC ENEMY | | Current Location: | work | | Subject: | AM I GAY? | | Time: | 02:48 pm | | Current Mood: | busy |
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| So the other day I was being a total doucher and checking out some lady type person that walked in to my store. She was wearing womens clothing. But it wasent overtly feminine (jeans and a shirt). Soft features. A soft spoken voice so one couldnt hear the true tones of it. granny panties... when i handed back her change my finger tips brushed against her palms only to feel the roughest, most calloused, sand papery, porn star vag feeling hand ever! I believe I might have been lusting after a hermi. what the eff is wrong with me?
On a lighter note, i saw a man that literally looked pregnant who admits to getting his hair done at paper doll. fat mike theorizes that he used to be a woman and has a stone baby floating around in his disgusting god forsaken womb which this individual has obviously neglected/rejected.
p.s. he bought a motley cru record. and my penis possessing future f*ck buddy bought some Madonna
balls nigga. | | comments: 4 comments or Leave a comment |
| who knew that faggoty emo from 8 years ago would infiltrate hip hop? not the mainstream is that brightest of the bunch, but its a part of the culture either way.
Lets put it this way... KANYE MUST BE STOPPED! not necessarily killed but definitely taken out of my life. Take away his contract and MPC and we'll be good to go. But yo, everyone knows why this f*cker is annoying as hell but this record makes me draw the line.
A) the title alone sounds like someone trying to make fun of gym class heros,
B) auto tuner. WHAT THE F*CK! how many suposed straight black men are gonna rip off Cher's studio tricks. T-Pain knows its bull sh*t. thats why that nigga bleaches his dreads and wears a top hat.
C) all of this cuz his mom died getting titty surgery. god let this happen because no 65 year old woman should care this much about her sagging effing boobs. Nor should her son! "waa waa waa im kanye and im rich with endorsement deals,air play, multi platinum records, i was on the cover of time, and have a whole generation of people swinging from my black wrinkly nut sack." f*ck yourself. if I was george w. bush i wouldnt care about black people either if all i saw was you.
D) its all just one more act in the minstrel show. for years hes pulled some straight up uncle tom crap when he grew up upper middle class. Now his true colors are showing and hes sounding like a 16 year old white kid on LJ! not to mention he probably owes new order some royalties.
f*ck balls. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| i dont even have a joke for that.
but that wont stop me from rambling. 10 years man. 10 F*CKING YEARS! how the hell did that crap last? even that tool carson daly jumped ship wtf? the last episode was glorious. a) jesse camp was on it b) it showed how completely culturally irrelevant that bull sh*t was at this point. since all there flash back videos were from when i was in jr high. the sad part about it though kids? IT USED TO ACTUALLY BE CULTURALLY RELEVANT! that sh*t defined a useless generation whos destined to ruin this planet. one thing i wont miss is a screaming vagina in the middle of a song i might actually like but id never get the opportunity to know cuz i will never ever here the fking song! suck my under sized dick trl. you ruined/made my adolescent years. | | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | some b.s. | | Current Location: | work | | Subject: | EAT A DICK | | Time: | 07:51 pm | | Current Mood: | ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/sad.gif) hungry |
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| | Im really hungry... I just might. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Should this tubby, racist,faggoty, black,broke, 7-11 loving vato fantasizer move to l.a. for school? which would of course lead to my eventual world domination, subsequent drug habbit, hernia, therapy attendance and marrige to chris crocker and jeffree star. | | comments: 11 comments or Leave a comment |
| | YOU PUNK BI*CH! boredom can cause a grown man to shove an ipod up his own ass while it plays lynard skynards simple man in spanish while he does the hokey pokey on top of a pile of used gorilla condoms while sarah palin is cumming on a south american 3rd grader carving rangerbobs name in to her ample bosom using freddy kreugars glove. somebody please kill me. | | comments: 4 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | BAD BRAINS!!! | | Current Location: | work | | Subject: | SUCK MY BALLS | | Time: | 07:22 pm | | Current Mood: | hungry |
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| | yo on the real son sp00n is my sh*t! beriously yo, im on that niggas tip fa sho. killmyself eatin bird seed out a niggas ass like pelican suckin dick? word. and eli porter? greatest rapper of all time! f*ck! i wanna see a snuff with those niggas, ashton kutcher, jaime lyn spears and anne coulter! im gettin hard already... whatevs yo, f*ck bi*ches get money. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | good ol jimmy cliff | | Current Location: | work | | Subject: | CLUSTER F*CK | | Time: | 06:38 pm | | Current Mood: | pessimistic |
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| | whats up with crazy ass niggas thinkin im down to bust out cake farts (google it), r.o.t.c. jackhammers (urban dictionary if you dare), kitty humping (something my brother showed me), milking milton borrows (wood) and molesting politicians (6:00 to midnight). (ok, so id totally do the last two but you get the point). my job scares me. and so does the fact that my only skill is the ability to be a huge asshole. (how do get paid for that...)and think somebody just grabbed my ass. but yo. "if i dont make it, tell everyone ive had my fun" and just so you know, my suicide letter would totally look like this except it would have cheetoe stains on it, be dedicated to jacki spencer and be wet from the kool aid my fat ass would undoubtedly get spilled when i tried to off my self. SPAGHETTI SPAGHETTI SPAGHETTI... get awkward yall... | | comments: 4 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | adam sandler "the goat" | | Current Location: | work | | Subject: | GOD HATES ME | | Time: | 07:55 pm | | Current Mood: | hungry |
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| | What the f*ck ese? Check this, Sunday evening I walk out to my car and see that someone decided to surprise me and and drop a huge steaming pile of crap next to my car in the parking space. literally, a steaming pile of sh*t. human fecal matter! next to that, a puddle of urine. fkin pee ese! on top of my car? some rancid reeking t shirt at one point sold to some poor bastard of a tourist who had the word "sucker" written across his fore head. everything smelled so terrible. like satans nut sack... BUT WORSE. for some reason they opened up my car... i shutter to think of all of this. So ummm... remind me to lean out side of my vehicle the next time im commuting on the freeway and commence in dragging my face on the ground. At least ill be able to make sense out of that. f*ck you world, your not worth saving. eat a dick clairemont. | | comments: 4 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Yo, how f*cking sick would it be to have a lightsaber? Not only a sword, but a laser! not to mention retractible. Id f*ck sh*t up like when im on the toilet or having unprotected sex with an unoficial hooker with no teeth that i met under a bridge. the future is bright children. the future is bright... | | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment |
| Is it wrong that i could give less of crap if dakota fanning gets raped and beat every day for the remainder of her existance (in life or death)? In the words of trucky: "CUVA YO GRILL!"
Also, should i go to hell for pondering a sexual attraction towards miley cyrus? Im not sure if i do... im not sure if i would... but im not ruling it out. I heard from a very reliable source that if it wasent for her money grubbing, mullet loving, vicariously living douche bag of a father she'd be doing porn. Now im not saying thats the sh*t. But id be lying if I said that wasent intrigueing.
And for the record: PERVERSION RULES & PEDOPHILIA IS STILL HILARIOUS. put the two together and you get my dear uncle earl oh how i miss him and the pony rides hed give... | | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment |
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myhomeboysahoto's journal